Friday, January 27, 2006

Fixodent and Forget It

In every arewa newsroom, people were closely examining the Union Street B&B's dildo collection.Everybody was talking about The Union Street Bed and Breakfast this week, that quaint little place in Schenectady that's crawling with wild swingers. Folks in area newsrooms were especially drawn to the photos in the adult section, but people weren't wondering about The Dungeon Cross or what gets examined on The Examining Table ---they were curious about that tube of Fixodent among all the toys.
Fixodent? Is it there as a courtesy to aging hedonists who may need to glue those dentures back in? Maybe not. I'm starting to think it may have something to do with making sure the ...uh...attachments...stay properly adhered to the...ummm... motorized devices. This testimonial is from the Fixodent web site:
"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! For making the new little tipped tube that I asked for! It is just perfect for me! It's the best design on the market today and Fixodent has the best holding power! I'm lovin' it!" -Phyllis, Marshall, MI
Don't want those things coming loose and getting lost, do we?