Monday, August 22, 2005

The Great Race

Oh, boy! It's almost time for the Travers 900, that special dark day tradition where jockeys race go-carts against local media figures at the Great Escape. I was not invited, but I do have a couple of pieces of advice:

First of all, don't mess around with the riders, they may be small, but any one of them could give you a serious ass kicking, even Chantal Sutherland. No cutting them off, no trash talking, no nothing.

Next, attention Dan Murphy: It would be very unfortunate if FOX 23's Rich Becker had some sort of horrible accident during the race, you know, something that left him unable to continue his broadcasting career. Then the station would need a news sports guy, capice?

Third
thing: Stay WAY clear of Ed O'Brien. It may be early in the day to you, but to him it's like 2am, if you know what I mean.